"Seems when bands focus on horror flicks, they fall into two general categories: you have the non-human monsters, such as Children of the Night and The Scared Stiffs), or the human monsters (e.g., cannibals and mass murderers), such as The Cramps and now CHESTY MALONE AND THE SLICE ‘EM UPS. Their CD, “Now We’re Gonna See What Disaster Really Means” (Wrecked; c/o chestymalone.com), is a fuckin’ hoot. Post-hardcore speed with a New York ‘80s style, they pound their way through 13 numbers, such as “Trouble With Cannibals” (one of my faves), “13 Killers” (what, no mention of New Yorker Albert Fish?), “Meat Factory,” “Skincrawl,” “Livereaters,” “Dotti Douchebag Sings the Blues,” and “Beavershot.” Thing is, from the first to the last, this is such a fun release, that its 30 minutes goes by so quickly. Chesty Malone, in her latest incarnation (she was the lead singer of Lady Unluck), is Jaqueline Blownaparte, whose throaty voice is not so much a death rattle, as it is a body slam, using a 24-pounder. The rest of the band, which includes her partner/co-writer/guitarist Anthony Allen van Hoek, keeps up with her (or she keeps up with them…either way it works). There are a lot of cool subtle film references throughout, such as “Spiderbaby” in “Livereaters” and perhaps “The Corpse Grinders” in “Meat Factory.” I haven’t caught them live, but it’s definitely on the agenda."
--Robert Barry Francos, Jersey Beat Fanzine
CHESTY MALONE AND THE SLICE ’EM UPS:
Now We’re Gonna See What Disaster Really Means CD
These guys are essentially a trashy metal band with a singer from the post-Plasmatics
school of rock and a slathering of biker-punk chutzpah. Lyrically, however,
they seem to have cribbed notes from many a splatter flick, resulting in music
that sounds like kin to Los Angeles’ long-gone, much-missed Haunted Garage,
minus the rat traps on the eyes, brain-in-a-jar, and copious amounts of blood.
-–Jimmy Alvarado, Razorcake Mag
Chesty Malone and the Slice ‘em Ups – “…what disaster really means” - While the singer dishes out more sass than trash, Chesty Malone & the Slice ‘em Ups would bloody more than a few lips in any rock–n-roll rumble. They stick to the basic horror-core punk–n-roll style, but do so with a few tricks up their bloodied ripped off sleeves beyond the usual three chords. The guitar has garage attitude, with plenty of tough flourishes and the vocals have the range from snotty punk to intense & edgy rock-n-roll. Frolicking bass-lines with fast and furious drums propel the album's best songs “Ghouls & Gangs” & “BPPS (eat shit)”, which tear along at full throttle, seemingly ready to run off the road at any minute. Chesty Malone & the Slice ‘em Ups approach the landscape of horror-core at its finest with skin-crawling lyrics combined with an eerie rock-n-roll flair. In other words this would be the perfect soundtrack for sneaking off to lover’s lane or make-out point to literally rock the night away.
--Jonny Taint, Punk Rock Review
"Next up were Chesty Malone and the Slice 'em Ups. I have been hearing quite the buzz about these guys and was really excited about finally seeing them live and in the rotting flesh! (quite possibly the best name for a band) Fronted by the unrelenting Jaqueline Blownaparte, a frontwoman not to be messed with! I got an eye and earful of punishing blood, sweat, sex and gore. Great gutsy theatrics and brutal punk rock with an edge all its own. This is the kind of live show so few bands have the balls to perform. Rock n' roll is supposed to be dangerous! My favorite song was "Beavershot", dedicated to all us ladies. I'm pretty sure I got one from where I was standing, or perhaps it was the toxic mixture of libations flowin' through me. Chesty Malone and the Slice 'em Ups are my new favorite NYC band."
--Karol Khaos, NY Waste Mag
"This month's soundtrack to a speeding ticket goes to Chesty Malone & the Slice 'em Ups and their latest five song rocker. Heavy kickin' tunes that will have you flying, crusher guitars and graveyard vocals - imagine Motorhead versus Sabbath to see who gets to go drinkin' with the grim reaper."
--Starr Tucker, NY Waste Mag
"Frontwoman Jaqueline Blownaparte of local punk-metal ghouls Chesty
Malone and the Slice 'em Ups screeches like Courtney Love in her heyday (but
don't tell her that or she's liable to break an empty bottle of Old Grandad
over your head)."
--Gerry Mak, Flavorpill.com
"The lead singer of this band is hot and totally scary!"
--KustomKitten, GigPosters.com
"Possibly the best named band on the planet! Brilliant band, of course they're brilliant, Chesty Malone & the Slice 'em Ups is the most ingenious band name ever!"
--Doctor Von Bracken, Scare Waves Radio UK